what is the sound of no hand clapping?

the clown had broken both his arms.

that was a weird time. his character in the play was supposed to balance on one of the rafters above the stage and at some point, the character would almost fall off the beam. it was the dress rehearsal, the night before opening night when the clown decided that he really needed to give himself that extra push. the clown had decided that he would almost fall like no other actor.

in his burst of enthusiasm, the almost fall became a plummet down twelve feet of air with his arms outstretched in front of him, instinctively trying to break the fall. as it turned out, he managed to avoid any major injuries, but he also managed to have two hairline fractures fissure their way up both ulna, leaving him walking around in two slings, bearing the slight resemblance of a mental patient in a straightjacket.

it would have been more comedic if it hadn't occurred to me that he was, specifically, my mental patient in a straightjacket.

the clown is very talented. with two working arms, he can perform acrobatics, juggle, do wacky hand stands and make incredible art. without the two working arms, he was even more phenomenal with the one thing that he could manage to do:

he was an amazing etch-a-sketch artist.

two knobs. that's all he needed. with the slightest movement on either dial, he could navigate x and y to create the most mind-boggling replications of shel silverstein, dr. seuss, ralph steadman, or even original clown art straight from the brain. it was absolutely incredible.

despite his accomplishments as an etch-a-sketch savant, the disabled clown was still unable to do the most basic things. it was as though i had suddenly inherited a five foot ten child and it left me a little bewildered. it made me think of the jonathan winters character in mork and mindy. on ork, of course, the baby is huge and the elder is tiny.

you would think that life would be weird enough if you were in love with a clown. that, right there, is enough for a dali painting in itself. but life gets stranger when you're brushing his teeth and shaving his chin. shoelaces need to be tied, spoons lifted from plates and into the mouth. the clown needed care.

eventually, he and i got into our little routine and his arms slowly healed. over the span of six weeks, his arms got stronger and he was eventually able to lose the slings, giving him more freedom of movement. i was relieved when i, too, was able to regain the use of my two arms primarily for my own selfish purposes.

once again, life was able to return back to just me and the fully autonomous clown.

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