here on the island
the tourists are easily recognized by their shiny new crayola-colored cars because the locals know that having a new car here is just plain stupid. the heat and salt and moisture of the tropical climate soon dissolves all new cars into rust-colored sardine boxes. the locals know this because they all drive rust-colored sardine boxes themselves.
if man is defined by his car - a tourist even more so. the locals can instantly identify which cars are the best to raid. ah, the booty found in one of those sporty new mercury sables can pay for several days worth of alcohol if done right.
these are the new pirates of the high seas. the difference these days is that instead of the pirates coming to the victims, the victims are voluntarily transporting themselves in droves to the pirates. hooray for tourism and capitalism! make the rich come to the poor and take their money with a smile. that's what you get you colonialist bastards!
and the locals smile as the sable drives into their town
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